Original Poem / Song: Scared to Search My Heart

depression_202626

I’m scared to search my heart,
Afraid of what I will find;
I’m scared of moving forward,
So I’m falling behind;
Don’t want to face my enemy,
So I’ll remain a slave;
I’m not sure I want to know
What it means to be brave.

I know You’ll give me courage,
But I’m happy to remain
Trapped in a life of cowardice
As long as it means no pain.
O Savior, Father, help me!
Remind me what You’ve done.
You chose a life of pain and grief
When You sent us Your Son.

I know that I’m a coward
And I don’t deserve to see
That this comfy life’s a prison
And you’ve handed me the key.
You’re showing me to freedom –
But now I count the cost.
Help me see my comfort
From the vantage of the cross.

You didn’t die
So I could live
With cold hands fisted,
Nothing to give.
You didn’t suffer agony
So I could waste away
Comfortably.
You said, “Take up your mat and walk,”
So why am I on the floor?
I know I have the strength to go;
I need to trust You more.

I’m scared to search my heart,
So show me gently within;
Afraid of moving forward;
Help me break the web of sin.
Don’t want to face my enemy,
But now by grace I see
That the pain and death are in the cell –
To fight means victory.

— Original song by Bethany A. Jennings, June 7, 2015

Leave a comment

1 Comment

  1. I love it!

    Reply

I love to hear your thoughts!